LiL Momma

The Male Rules
>>
>>We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the
>>rules from the male side. These are their rules! Please note ...
>>these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
>>
>>1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up,
>>put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us
>>complaining about you leaving it down.
>>
>>1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see
>>if we can find the perfect present yet again!
>>
>>1. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.
>>
>>1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the
>>tides. Let it be.
>>
>>1. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive
>>than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married
>>is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're
>>stuck with her.
>>
>>1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of
>>it that way.
>>
>>1. Crying is blackmail.
>>
>>1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints
>>do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work!
>>Just say it!
>>
>>1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on the
>>calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.
>>
>>1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes -- tops. What makes you think
>>we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look
>>good with your dress?
>>
>>1. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
>>
>>1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
>>That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
>>
>>1. A headache that last for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
>>
>>1. Check your oil! Please.
>>
>>1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In
>>fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
>>
>>1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We
>>refuse to answer.
>>
>>1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the
>>ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
>>
>>1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it
>>done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it
>>yourself.
>>
>>
>>1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
>>
>>1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.
>>
>>1. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two
>>months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your
>>girlfriends.
>>
>>
>>1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
>>Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a
>>fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
>>
>>1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
>>
>>1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of
>>mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.
>>
>>1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like
>>nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth
>>the hassle.
>>
>>1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an
>>answer you don't want to hear.
>>
>>1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.
>>
>>Really.
>>
>>
>>1. You have enough clothes.
>>
>>1. You have too many shoes.
>>
>>1. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz
>>together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.
>>
>>1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the
>>couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mind that, it's
>>like camping.

jmacdaddyt

:*****

angeleyez

that sounds like something my boyfriend would say!!!!

Lance__

i am giving a copy of that to evry girl i date from now on...LOL

babebblues

That is awsome!!! It's like every guys manuel..........

babebblues

That is awsome!!! It's like very guys manuel..........

Erika

OMG funny stuff.....quick take it down before the guys catch on.....

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