Fri funnies on Thurs????
Thread Starter
dedrater
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 9,815
From: Lewiston, Me
Re: Fri funnies on Thurs????
Mark Your Calendars For This Saturday,
As You May Already Know, It Is A Sin For A Taliban Male To
See Any Woman Other Than His Wife Naked, And That He Must Commit
Suicide
If He Does.
So This Saturday At 4 P.m. Eastern Time All American Women
Are Asked To
Walk Out Of Their House Completely Naked To Help Weed Out Any
Neighborhood Terrorists.
Circling Your Block For One Hour Is Recommended For This
Anti-terrorist Effort.
All Men Are To Position Themselves In Lawn Chairs In Front Of Their
House
To Prove They Are Not Taliban, And To Demonstrate That They Think
Its
Okay To See Nude Women Other Than Their Wife And To Show Support
For All
American Women.
And Since The Taliban Also Does Not Approve Of Alcohol, A
Cold 6-pack At Your Side Is Further Proof Of Your Anti-taliban
Sentiment.
The American Government Appreciates Your Efforts To Root Out
Terrorists And
Applauds Your Participation In This Anti-terrorist Activity. God
Bless
America.
It Is Your Patriotic Duty To Pass This On
As You May Already Know, It Is A Sin For A Taliban Male To
See Any Woman Other Than His Wife Naked, And That He Must Commit
Suicide
If He Does.
So This Saturday At 4 P.m. Eastern Time All American Women
Are Asked To
Walk Out Of Their House Completely Naked To Help Weed Out Any
Neighborhood Terrorists.
Circling Your Block For One Hour Is Recommended For This
Anti-terrorist Effort.
All Men Are To Position Themselves In Lawn Chairs In Front Of Their
House
To Prove They Are Not Taliban, And To Demonstrate That They Think
Its
Okay To See Nude Women Other Than Their Wife And To Show Support
For All
American Women.
And Since The Taliban Also Does Not Approve Of Alcohol, A
Cold 6-pack At Your Side Is Further Proof Of Your Anti-taliban
Sentiment.
The American Government Appreciates Your Efforts To Root Out
Terrorists And
Applauds Your Participation In This Anti-terrorist Activity. God
Bless
America.
It Is Your Patriotic Duty To Pass This On
Thread Starter
dedrater
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 9,815
From: Lewiston, Me
Re: Fri funnies on Thurs????
A Texan, a guy from Massachusetts, and a Mainer are riding horses out on the range ...
The Texan ... just to show off ... pulls an expensive bottle of whiskey out of his saddlebag, takes a couple drinks, throws the bottle into the air, pulls out his gun and shoots it in mid-air.
The guy from Massachusetts is shocked and asks, "What are you doing? That's a perfectly good bottle of whiskey!"
The Texan replies, "In Texas, there's plenty of whiskey and bottles are cheap!"
A little while later ... not wanting to be outdone ... the guy from Massachusetts pulls out a bottle of champagne, takes a few sips, throws the bottle into the air, pulls out his gun and shoots it just like the Texan.
The guy from Maine can't believe it. "What are you doing? That was a very expensive bottle of champagne!"
With a wink to the Texan he says, "In Boston, there's plenty of champagne and bottles are cheap!"
About 15 minutes later, the Mainer pulls out a bottle of beer. He opens it and takes a sip ... then another sip ... then he chugs the rest of the bottle. Then he places the bottle back in his saddlebag, pulls out his gun and shoots the guy from Massachusetts.
The Texan is visibly shaken ... "What did you do that for?!!"
The Mainer replies ... "Well, in Maine, we have plenty of people from Massachusetts and bottles are returnable."
The Texan ... just to show off ... pulls an expensive bottle of whiskey out of his saddlebag, takes a couple drinks, throws the bottle into the air, pulls out his gun and shoots it in mid-air.
The guy from Massachusetts is shocked and asks, "What are you doing? That's a perfectly good bottle of whiskey!"
The Texan replies, "In Texas, there's plenty of whiskey and bottles are cheap!"
A little while later ... not wanting to be outdone ... the guy from Massachusetts pulls out a bottle of champagne, takes a few sips, throws the bottle into the air, pulls out his gun and shoots it just like the Texan.
The guy from Maine can't believe it. "What are you doing? That was a very expensive bottle of champagne!"
With a wink to the Texan he says, "In Boston, there's plenty of champagne and bottles are cheap!"
About 15 minutes later, the Mainer pulls out a bottle of beer. He opens it and takes a sip ... then another sip ... then he chugs the rest of the bottle. Then he places the bottle back in his saddlebag, pulls out his gun and shoots the guy from Massachusetts.
The Texan is visibly shaken ... "What did you do that for?!!"
The Mainer replies ... "Well, in Maine, we have plenty of people from Massachusetts and bottles are returnable."
Registered User
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 3,432
From: Formerly Texas now Minnesota
Re: Fri funnies on Thurs????
hehe I will make sure I walk around for at least an hour.. haha I can get a tan LOL 
I dont have many jokes but here is one
"what is green and smells like pork?"
Kermits finger
I dont have many jokes but here is one
"what is green and smells like pork?"
Kermits finger
I Enjoy Posting At StuntLife!
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 2,564
From: Presque Isle, Maine
Re: Fri funnies on Thurs????
Originally Posted by moemoe
why cant monkey's play a civilized game of poker in the jungle?
cuz there's a bunch of cheetah's out there 
cuz there's a bunch of cheetah's out there
Registered User
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,049
From: Juneau, WI
Re: Fri funnies on Thurs????
Originally Posted by ryanaka99cents
that was like gay humor......................i think your in the wrong thread
come on now.....i'm hungover and that was the first one that popped in my head.....i've got others but i think they might be alittle 2 hardcore for this thread 
Thread Starter
dedrater
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 9,815
From: Lewiston, Me
Re: Fri funnies on Thurs????
Originally Posted by moemoe
come on now.....i'm hungover and that was the first one that popped in my head.....i've got others but i think they might be alittle 2 hardcore for this thread let em fly lol
Registered User
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,049
From: Juneau, WI
Re: Fri funnies on Thurs????
Originally Posted by verticaljay
let em fly lol
i cannot be held responsible seeing as how you gave me the thumbs up
so this black guy walks into a bar with this parrot on his shoulder
the bartender says "hey where ya get that"
and the parrot says "in africa, theres thousands of em"
:YEAH Thread Starter
dedrater
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 9,815
From: Lewiston, Me
Re: Fri funnies on Thurs????
Originally Posted by moemoe
i cannot be held responsible seeing as how you gave me the thumbs up
so this black guy walks into a bar with this parrot on his shoulder
the bartender says "hey where ya get that"
and the parrot says "in africa, theres thousands of em" :YEAH
so this black guy walks into a bar with this parrot on his shoulder
the bartender says "hey where ya get that"
and the parrot says "in africa, theres thousands of em"
:YEAH
*disclaimer... we are not prejudice just putting forth jokes we have heard and passing them on to others*
Oh and Im french so anyone wanna tear on frenchies feel free
I Enjoy Posting At StuntLife!
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 2,564
From: Presque Isle, Maine
Re: Fri funnies on Thurs????
Originally Posted by Jay6
Whats the best part about sleeping with twenty eight year olds?
There are twenty of them
There are twenty of them
Registered User
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 6,109
From: Portland, ME
Re: Fri funnies on Thurs????
Originally Posted by ryanaka99cents
lets hear some more I got the whole office here laughing at those
Your dik looks fukin huge
I Enjoy Posting At StuntLife!
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 2,564
From: Presque Isle, Maine
Re: Fri funnies on Thurs????
Jay6 omg no more, I can't take it 
Two nuns riding down a cobbled road on bicycles. First one says to the other, "I've never come this way before." Other nun says, "Neither have I. It's probably the cobbles."
Two nuns riding down a cobbled road on bicycles. First one says to the other, "I've never come this way before." Other nun says, "Neither have I. It's probably the cobbles."
