Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
Squid...
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 3,749
From: Krum, Texas, USA
Re: Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
Original ad:
Old/used soccer equipment wanted for my kid. Will drive to pick up anywhere near Malvern. No calls, email only: ************@verizon.net
From Me to ************@verizon.net:
Hello,
I have a bunch of old soccer equipment that would be perfect for your daughter. I have soccer *****, nets, cleats, etc. Let me know specifically what you need and we can talk prices.
Thanks,
Mike
From ************@verizon.net to Me:
Actually the stuff is for my son because I want to get him started in soccer. I'm in need of a practice net, soccer ball and kids size 6 cleats if you have them. Thanks.
From Me to ************@verizon.net:
My mistake, I assumed it was for your daughter because it is soccer. If that is the way you want to raise your son, I have some other items you may want to buy for him. I have a pink twirling baton with silver ribbons, and a cheerleader set consisting of two pom-poms, pink cheerleader bloomers, and a toy megaphone.
I'm charging $100 for the practice net, $20 for the ball, $25 for the baton, and $30 for the cheerleader set. I don't have kids size 6 cleats, but you don't really need cleats for soccer anyway. Your son could probably just use his bunny slippers.
Let me know if you are interested.
Mike
From ************@verizon.net to Me:
Well I'm definitely interested in kicking your ******* ***. One question, *******: if you think soccer is so gay, why do you have soccer equipment, and a cheerleader set and baton?
From Me to ************@verizon.net:
Please, you aren't kicking anyone's ***. The fact that you are getting your son started in soccer instead of football says a lot about you as a man.
To answer your question, I have the baton and cheerleader set as trophies. When I was a kid, I used to go around the neighborhood and beat up all the other kids who played soccer and steal their stuff. I acquired the cheerleader set and baton from this one kid in the neighborhood, Caleb. I always knew that kid wasn't right - he used to ride around on a pink bike and always wanted to have tea parties with the other kids. I tried to help him by beating him up and stealing his baton, but I don't think it worked. I saw him in Philly a few years ago, blowing some guy in an alley. Anyway, I kept my gatherings in my shed out back as a testament to my manliness, but I need to make room for my new shotgun and power saw.
So do you want the stuff or not? I also have Brokeback Mountain on DVD. I ordered Die Hard, but that was sent to me in error. It sounds like a movie that you and your son would enjoy watching.
From ************@verizon.net to Me:
You must be so proud of what a big man you are with your shotgun and power saw.
From Me to ************@verizon.net:
You're goddamn right I am. It's just part of being a man, which you apparently know nothing about. Tell you what - forget the baton and cheerleader set. I want to help you. I'll sell you my shotgun for $1,700. It is a 10-gauge Remington that'll put some hair on your chest. Take your son hunting with it. There is nothing more manly than blowing a deer's head off and eating the raw venison from its neck.
Then, after you are done manning up, you can come back and I'll sell you some football equipment for your son. I'd hate to see him blowing Caleb in an alley in Philly some day.
From ************@verizon.net to Me:
How about you take your shotgun and stick it up your *** and pull the trigger? Go **** yourself.
Old/used soccer equipment wanted for my kid. Will drive to pick up anywhere near Malvern. No calls, email only: ************@verizon.net
From Me to ************@verizon.net:
Hello,
I have a bunch of old soccer equipment that would be perfect for your daughter. I have soccer *****, nets, cleats, etc. Let me know specifically what you need and we can talk prices.
Thanks,
Mike
From ************@verizon.net to Me:
Actually the stuff is for my son because I want to get him started in soccer. I'm in need of a practice net, soccer ball and kids size 6 cleats if you have them. Thanks.
From Me to ************@verizon.net:
My mistake, I assumed it was for your daughter because it is soccer. If that is the way you want to raise your son, I have some other items you may want to buy for him. I have a pink twirling baton with silver ribbons, and a cheerleader set consisting of two pom-poms, pink cheerleader bloomers, and a toy megaphone.
I'm charging $100 for the practice net, $20 for the ball, $25 for the baton, and $30 for the cheerleader set. I don't have kids size 6 cleats, but you don't really need cleats for soccer anyway. Your son could probably just use his bunny slippers.
Let me know if you are interested.
Mike
From ************@verizon.net to Me:
Well I'm definitely interested in kicking your ******* ***. One question, *******: if you think soccer is so gay, why do you have soccer equipment, and a cheerleader set and baton?
From Me to ************@verizon.net:
Please, you aren't kicking anyone's ***. The fact that you are getting your son started in soccer instead of football says a lot about you as a man.
To answer your question, I have the baton and cheerleader set as trophies. When I was a kid, I used to go around the neighborhood and beat up all the other kids who played soccer and steal their stuff. I acquired the cheerleader set and baton from this one kid in the neighborhood, Caleb. I always knew that kid wasn't right - he used to ride around on a pink bike and always wanted to have tea parties with the other kids. I tried to help him by beating him up and stealing his baton, but I don't think it worked. I saw him in Philly a few years ago, blowing some guy in an alley. Anyway, I kept my gatherings in my shed out back as a testament to my manliness, but I need to make room for my new shotgun and power saw.
So do you want the stuff or not? I also have Brokeback Mountain on DVD. I ordered Die Hard, but that was sent to me in error. It sounds like a movie that you and your son would enjoy watching.
From ************@verizon.net to Me:
You must be so proud of what a big man you are with your shotgun and power saw.
From Me to ************@verizon.net:
You're goddamn right I am. It's just part of being a man, which you apparently know nothing about. Tell you what - forget the baton and cheerleader set. I want to help you. I'll sell you my shotgun for $1,700. It is a 10-gauge Remington that'll put some hair on your chest. Take your son hunting with it. There is nothing more manly than blowing a deer's head off and eating the raw venison from its neck.
Then, after you are done manning up, you can come back and I'll sell you some football equipment for your son. I'd hate to see him blowing Caleb in an alley in Philly some day.
From ************@verizon.net to Me:
How about you take your shotgun and stick it up your *** and pull the trigger? Go **** yourself.
Thats awsome 
Thread Starter
bp chaser
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 85,653
From: LI, NY and I drive in Australia
Re: Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
lmao at this one: http://wwww.dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=66
Thread Starter
bp chaser
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 85,653
From: LI, NY and I drive in Australia
Squid...
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 3,749
From: Krum, Texas, USA
Re: Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
lmao at this one: http://wwww.dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=66
I Hope you miss and kill a cat, *****..
Thread Starter
bp chaser
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 85,653
From: LI, NY and I drive in Australia
Re: Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
From Me to Brian ******:
Oh, do you think your Civic isn't capable of towing my truck? I understand. Tell you what, I'll talk to my friend Anthony. He's a mechanic, and could put a better motor in your car so it has more power to tow my truck. It shouldn't cost that much. What is your number? I'll tell him to give you a call.
Oh, do you think your Civic isn't capable of towing my truck? I understand. Tell you what, I'll talk to my friend Anthony. He's a mechanic, and could put a better motor in your car so it has more power to tow my truck. It shouldn't cost that much. What is your number? I'll tell him to give you a call.
Thread Starter
bp chaser
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 85,653
From: LI, NY and I drive in Australia
Re: Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
The following post is a set of e-mails from me actually trying to sell my TV. I guess I was asking too much for it.
Original ad:
PLASMA HDTV - $850
I'm selling my 42" 720p Samsung Plasma TV (PN42A410). I bought it a year ago and there is nothing wrong with it. I just want to get a bigger TV with more P's.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
hey will you take $700 for it
From Me to ************@yahoo.com
You are asking me to drop the price by $150. I am willing to do this if you let me shoot you in the groin with my paintball gun 20 times in a row. You can't wear a cup. I get to set the velocity to 450 FPS.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
seriously?
From Me to ************@yahoo.com
Yes. 20 shots and its yours.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
uhh no. hows $750 sound
From Me to ************@yahoo.com
Do you have a girlfriend? If you do, and she is hot (I'll need pics), and she blows me, you can have the TV for $750. You can't watch either.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
**** off dude
From Me to ************@yahoo.com
Tell you what, I'll sell it to you for $900 and you won't have to do any of that stuff.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
wtf your ad said $850
From Me to ************@yahoo.com
I added $50 for you trying to haggle me. I'll remove this $50 haggling fee if you let me break an empty vodka bottle over your head.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
**** off
Original ad:
PLASMA HDTV - $850
I'm selling my 42" 720p Samsung Plasma TV (PN42A410). I bought it a year ago and there is nothing wrong with it. I just want to get a bigger TV with more P's.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
hey will you take $700 for it
From Me to ************@yahoo.com
You are asking me to drop the price by $150. I am willing to do this if you let me shoot you in the groin with my paintball gun 20 times in a row. You can't wear a cup. I get to set the velocity to 450 FPS.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
seriously?
From Me to ************@yahoo.com
Yes. 20 shots and its yours.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
uhh no. hows $750 sound
From Me to ************@yahoo.com
Do you have a girlfriend? If you do, and she is hot (I'll need pics), and she blows me, you can have the TV for $750. You can't watch either.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
**** off dude
From Me to ************@yahoo.com
Tell you what, I'll sell it to you for $900 and you won't have to do any of that stuff.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
wtf your ad said $850
From Me to ************@yahoo.com
I added $50 for you trying to haggle me. I'll remove this $50 haggling fee if you let me break an empty vodka bottle over your head.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me
**** off
Zippy Tie Rider
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 3,408
From: Florida
Registered User
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 24,026
From: North Andover, MA
Re: Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
it rained so hard last night that my bathroom cieling started leaking......water was pissing in between the shingles and chimney......what a pain in the ***.......there are trees down everywhere and a lot of folks lost power......cool storm
what is he doing?
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 16,155
From: ny
Re: Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
cool. call me when you're on your way home. dj might go with us when we go play outside later. i told him we needed to run errands and what not and that i would call him when you're on your way home.
Thread Starter
bp chaser
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 85,653
From: LI, NY and I drive in Australia
Re: Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
is austin shoveling? if he does, make sure he brings the shovel back to the porch. that little ****** is notorious for leaving them in the backyard under a foot of snow
Attack Squirrel Owner
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 3,365
From: Kingston, PA
Re: Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
I'm going to leave work early. I took my daughter outside to play before work and want to go home to take her sledding again. This is from this morning...
what is he doing?
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 16,155
From: ny
Re: Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
what is he doing?
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 16,155
From: ny
Attack Squirrel Owner
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 3,365
From: Kingston, PA
Registered User
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 357
From: Wiscompton Rapids
Re: Bought my wife a new rack *PICS*
Original ad:
i need a grille not the cole kind but the gas kind. i will barter my skill as a landscaper in turn for a good grille if u need any kind of landscape work
From Me to **************@***********.org:
Hello,
I saw your ad looking for a grill in exchange for your landscaping skills. Do you do tree removal? If so, there is a very expensive grill in it for you.
Thanks,
Mike
From josh ******* to Me:
yes
From me to josh *******:
Great! There is a pine tree that has been bothering me and I want it cut down. You won't have to remove it. It hasn't been a problem until about two years ago when it got much taller. My problem with it is that it is obscuring the view to my neighbor's upstairs bathroom window. I used to have a perfect view of the neighbor's wife changing in the bathroom every day. She had great **** and an *** that was out of this world. It really completed my morning whenever I caught a glimpse of her. Now that this damn pine tree is in the way, I can't see a thing.
If you could go onto my neighbor's property and cut the tree down while they are at work, I will let you take the grill that is outside on their patio. I'm not sure what brand it is, but it is a gigantic propane grill. It looks really nice.
If they ask about it, I will tell them that a huge storm happened while they were at work, and the wind blew the tree over and blew the grill away. Meanwhile you will be enjoying a delicious salisbury steak from your new grill, and I wil be enjoying my neighbor's hot wife as she steps into the shower.
They usually leave for work around 7:30 AM during the week, and come back home around 6:00 PM. If you could have it done before they get back on Monday, that would be great.
Thanks,
Mike
From josh ******* to Me:
wat the **** r u smoking dude? so i cut down ur neigbors tree and u let me steal his grille. what a grate deal *** hole. how bout i just take the grille and dont cut down the tree u ****
From me to josh *******:
You don't know where his house is, so how are you going to steal the grill? I think my information in exchange for your services is a fair trade. I'll even let you come over for a few beers afterward, and we can watch the wife in the bathroom from my bedroom window.
Mike
From josh ******* to Me:
i dont want a stolen grille i want a real grille u retard wat da **** is ur problem. and i dont give a **** bout naked neigbor u ****** perv
From me to josh *******:
I assure you that this grill is real. By cutting down the tree, you are earning the grill and it will not be stolen. Also, if seeing a naked woman isn't your thing, you could probably catch the husband changing in the bathroom as well. I won't be watching, but I'm not one to judge your lifestyle.
Mike
From josh ******* to Me:
ur the fagot u dick sucking **** *** **** sucker!! eat a ****** dick u piece of shitt!!!
i need a grille not the cole kind but the gas kind. i will barter my skill as a landscaper in turn for a good grille if u need any kind of landscape work
From Me to **************@***********.org:
Hello,
I saw your ad looking for a grill in exchange for your landscaping skills. Do you do tree removal? If so, there is a very expensive grill in it for you.
Thanks,
Mike
From josh ******* to Me:
yes
From me to josh *******:
Great! There is a pine tree that has been bothering me and I want it cut down. You won't have to remove it. It hasn't been a problem until about two years ago when it got much taller. My problem with it is that it is obscuring the view to my neighbor's upstairs bathroom window. I used to have a perfect view of the neighbor's wife changing in the bathroom every day. She had great **** and an *** that was out of this world. It really completed my morning whenever I caught a glimpse of her. Now that this damn pine tree is in the way, I can't see a thing.
If you could go onto my neighbor's property and cut the tree down while they are at work, I will let you take the grill that is outside on their patio. I'm not sure what brand it is, but it is a gigantic propane grill. It looks really nice.
If they ask about it, I will tell them that a huge storm happened while they were at work, and the wind blew the tree over and blew the grill away. Meanwhile you will be enjoying a delicious salisbury steak from your new grill, and I wil be enjoying my neighbor's hot wife as she steps into the shower.
They usually leave for work around 7:30 AM during the week, and come back home around 6:00 PM. If you could have it done before they get back on Monday, that would be great.
Thanks,
Mike
From josh ******* to Me:
wat the **** r u smoking dude? so i cut down ur neigbors tree and u let me steal his grille. what a grate deal *** hole. how bout i just take the grille and dont cut down the tree u ****
From me to josh *******:
You don't know where his house is, so how are you going to steal the grill? I think my information in exchange for your services is a fair trade. I'll even let you come over for a few beers afterward, and we can watch the wife in the bathroom from my bedroom window.
Mike
From josh ******* to Me:
i dont want a stolen grille i want a real grille u retard wat da **** is ur problem. and i dont give a **** bout naked neigbor u ****** perv
From me to josh *******:
I assure you that this grill is real. By cutting down the tree, you are earning the grill and it will not be stolen. Also, if seeing a naked woman isn't your thing, you could probably catch the husband changing in the bathroom as well. I won't be watching, but I'm not one to judge your lifestyle.
Mike
From josh ******* to Me:
ur the fagot u dick sucking **** *** **** sucker!! eat a ****** dick u piece of shitt!!!
