Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse is taking his/her sweet time:
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 2,564
From: Presque Isle, Maine
Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse is taking his/her sweet time:
1. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor to the rest rooms.
4. Grab several boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts
when they aren't looking.
5. Move a "Caution - Wet Floor" sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll
only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't
you people just leave me alone?!?"
8. While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows
where the anti-depressants are.
9. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from
"Mission Impossible".
10. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size
funnels.
11. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through, say, "Pick
me! Pick me!!!"
12. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal
position and scream, "No! NO! It's the voices again!!!"
13. Go into the fitting room and yell real loudly, "Hey! We're out of
toilet paper in here!!"
2. Set all the alarm clocks in housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor to the rest rooms.
4. Grab several boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts
when they aren't looking.
5. Move a "Caution - Wet Floor" sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll
only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't
you people just leave me alone?!?"
8. While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows
where the anti-depressants are.
9. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from
"Mission Impossible".
10. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size
funnels.
11. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through, say, "Pick
me! Pick me!!!"
12. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal
position and scream, "No! NO! It's the voices again!!!"
13. Go into the fitting room and yell real loudly, "Hey! We're out of
toilet paper in here!!"
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