Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

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Old 01-24-2009, 07:14 AM
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Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

bring em doods.
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Old 01-24-2009, 09:27 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

navy gay

air force gay

army gay

marines are not gay

get it?
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Old 01-24-2009, 03:10 PM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Originally Posted by SkyeHack
navy gay

air force gay

army gay

marines are not gay

get it?
you're gay
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Old 01-24-2009, 03:17 PM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Originally Posted by SkyeHack
navy gay

air force gay

army gay

marines are not gay

get it?

Originally Posted by Armenian
you're gay
Take a joke.
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Old 01-24-2009, 06:33 PM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Originally Posted by SkyeHack
navy gay

air force gay

army gay

marines are not gay

get it?
ooo so u want me to bust out some marine joke ehy?


There is a soldier sitting at a bar and leans over his shoulder and ask the guy if he wants to here a marine joke? the guys says "im a marine and so are these two guys next to me.......u still wanna tell it? "soldier say no i dont want to explain it 3 times"
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Old 01-25-2009, 04:37 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Originally Posted by Soldier_89
ooo so u want me to bust out some marine joke ehy?


There is a soldier sitting at a bar and leans over his shoulder and ask the guy if he wants to here a marine joke? the guys says "im a marine and so are these two guys next to me.......u still wanna tell it? "soldier say no i dont want to explain it 3 times"
heres my next joke

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Old 01-25-2009, 09:05 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Originally Posted by SkyeHack
heres my next joke


hahahaha omg thats so sad.....he shuld get kicked out lol......even seen some pretty fat marines but hes huge!.....i should pop a pic of a marine in my college class.......the thing is he dropped out imagine that!
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Old 01-25-2009, 11:57 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Originally Posted by Unknown_Tom
Take a joke.
A joke is something thats funny. Placing the word "gay" after a word is a figure of speech not a joke.
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Old 01-25-2009, 11:58 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Originally Posted by SkyeHack
heres my next joke

Now that's funny

I've seen guys 3 times that size in my Navy days haha.
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Old 01-25-2009, 12:00 PM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Originally Posted by SkyeHack
heres my next joke

those are some scrumptious man boobers
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Old 01-25-2009, 05:26 PM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

hahaha he has nice ***** too.....i culd go on with endless jokes and disses on the usmc.


from wat i can see Marines= soldiers that believe in their own bulshit. i really think this is true from my exp. in the military imo
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Old 01-26-2009, 02:29 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

ARMY = Aren't Really MARINES Yet
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Old 01-26-2009, 12:35 PM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Originally Posted by SkyeHack
ARMY = Aren't Really MARINES Yet
PERFECT EXAMPLE OF WHY MARINES ARE JUST HOT HEAD THAT ARE SOLDIERS THAT BELIEVE IN THEIR OWN BULLSHIT!

ARMY BASIC=1O WEEKS
USMC BOOT=12 WEEKS

WOW 2 WEEKS GIVE U STATUS OF BEING THE BEST?

MARINES=LEAVE AFTER 12 WEEKS OF BOOT
ARMY= I WENT 24 WEEKS STRAIGHT THROW WIT NO LEAVE

MP ARMY SCHOOL WE WOULD BE LUCKY IF WE HAD A FEW HOUR PASS ON SUNDAY.......REST OF THE TIME WE GOT JACK ****.

MP MARINES GET NIGHTS OFF TO DO WATEVER SMOKE, PX, GYM EXT.....LIVED IN DORM WIT LIVING CONDITOINS ALOT BETTER

MARINE AVERAGE DEPLYMENT: 7 MONTHS
ARMY AVERAGE DEPLOYMENT: 1 1/2 YEAR

I CAN GO ON AND ON.......BUT I NEED TO GO TO SKOOL

WHAT HAS AN IQ OF 102?

100 MARINES AND ITS LT
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Old 01-26-2009, 12:47 PM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Originally Posted by Soldier_89
PERFECT EXAMPLE OF WHY MARINES ARE JUST HOT HEAD THAT ARE SOLDIERS THAT BELIEVE IN THEIR OWN BULLSHIT!

ARMY BASIC=1O WEEKS
USMC BOOT=12 WEEKS

WOW 2 WEEKS GIVE U STATUS OF BEING THE BEST?

MARINES=LEAVE AFTER 12 WEEKS OF BOOT
ARMY= I WENT 24 WEEKS STRAIGHT THROW WIT NO LEAVE

MP ARMY SCHOOL WE WOULD BE LUCKY IF WE HAD A FEW HOUR PASS ON SUNDAY.......REST OF THE TIME WE GOT JACK ****.

MP MARINES GET NIGHTS OFF TO DO WATEVER SMOKE, PX, GYM EXT.....LIVED IN DORM WIT LIVING CONDITOINS ALOT BETTER

MARINE AVERAGE DEPLYMENT: 7 MONTHS
ARMY AVERAGE DEPLOYMENT: 1 1/2 YEAR

I CAN GO ON AND ON.......BUT I NEED TO GO TO SKOOL

WHAT HAS AN IQ OF 102?

100 MARINES AND ITS LT
I'm pretty sure you're the one who started this thread. Obviously there's gonna be some branch bashing when the name of the thread is "Military jokes". Why don't you come back with some good jar head jokes or something?
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Old 01-28-2009, 03:24 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Marines Invade

Army Occupies

*drumroll*
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Old 01-28-2009, 03:57 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

Originally Posted by Soldier_89
hahaha he has nice ***** too.....i culd go on with endless jokes and disses on the usmc.


from wat i can see Marines= soldiers that believe in their own bulshit. i really think this is true from my exp. in the military imo
Apparently the Armys visual requirements are about as strict as their physical requirements......



Marine Intel. Bit of an oxymoron!

-Max
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Old 01-28-2009, 04:02 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

And not to start this ****, but stop adding inches here.

ARMY BASIC=1O WEEKS
USMC BOOT=12 WEEKS
Way to add one to yours, and subtract one from the Marines. Just so you dont continue with the misinformation (went over this in the other thread), it's 13 weeks, and then another month of 'combat training' for pogs, 2 more for grunts. Infantry training bn. was way harder then bootcamp anyway.

Ok now I'm done.

Wait, no I'm not. This stuff is funny too!

The safest place in Korea was right behind a platoon of Marines.
Lord, how they could fight! [MGen. Frank E. Lowe, USA; Korea, 26
January 1952]

Why in hell can't the Army do it if the Marines can. They are the
same kind of men; why can't they be like Marines. [Gen. John J.
"Black Jack" Pershing, USA; 12 February 1918]

I have just returned from visiting the Marines at the front, and
there is not a finer fighting organization in the world! [Gen.
Douglas MacArthur, USA; Korea, 21 September 1950]

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Old 01-28-2009, 04:15 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

There was a brief meeting of several Generals and an Admiral. The Air Force General said, "I think I have finally found a way to show you true guts. "Airman, come here!"

The airman trotted over and came to attention with a brisk, "Yes, sir?"

The Air force General said, "Airman, climb to the top of that flag pole".

"Yes, Sir", came the quick response and up the pole he went.

When the airman reached the top, the General told him to jump. The airman shouted, "Yes, Sir", and dropped to his death.

The General turned to his peers and said, "now that is guts."

The Army General did the same and the Admiral did too, with the same results as the Air Force poor airman. The Marine General told them they were all full of **** and called a Marine Private over. "Private, climb that flag pole!"

"Sir, yes, Sir!" was the quick response and up the pole he went. The Marine General than told him to jump. The Marine Privates response was, "Sir, no, Sir!". The General than turned to his peers and said, "now that's guts."
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Old 01-28-2009, 04:24 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

An Army Ranger was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana and he wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the Ranger shouted, "maybe I'll just go out and get my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes made at a reasonable price!"

The vendor said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you will run into a couple of Marines who were in here earlier saying the same thing."

So the Ranger headed into the bayou that same day and a few hours later came upon two men standing waist deep in the water. He thought, "those must be the two Marines the guy in town was talking about." Just then, the Ranger saw a tremendously long gator swimming rapidly underwater towards one of the Marines.

Just as the gator was about to attack, the Marine grabbed its neck with both hands and strangled it to death with very little effort. Then both Marines dragged it on shore and flipped it on its back. Laying nearby were several more of the creatures.

One of the Marines then exclaimed, "Damn, this one doesn't have any shoes either!"
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Old 01-28-2009, 05:26 AM
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Re: Lets Hear some Military jokes!!!!!!

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