i got this forward at work and thought i'd post it up
> HOW TO POOP AT WORK
>We've all been there but don't like to admit it. As much as we try to
>convince ourselves otherwise, the WORKPOOP is inevitable. For those who
>hate pooping at work, following is the Survival Guide for taking a dump
>at work.
>
>
>CROP DUSTING:
>
>When farting, you walk briskly around the office so the smell is not in
>your area and everyone else gets a whiff but doesn't know where it came
>from. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop until the full fart has
>been expelled.
>Walk an extra 30 feet to make sure the smell has left your pants.
>
>
>FLY BY:
>
>This is the act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in and
>check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and
>come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may
>become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.
>
>
>ESCAPEE:
>
>This is a fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or
>forcing a
>poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of
>embarrassment. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it.Pretend it
>did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal,
>pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee. It is uncomfortable
>for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.
>
>
>JAILBREAK:
>
>When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This
>is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should
>happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the
>bathroom to spare
>everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.
>
>
>COURTESY FLUSH:
>
>The act of flushing the toilet the instant the poop hits the water.This
>reduces the amount of airtime the poop has to stink up the bathroom.
>This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME.
>
>
>WALK OF SHAME:
>
>Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just
>stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if
>someone walks in
>and busts you. As with farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not
>exist. This very uncomfortable walk can be avoided with the use of the
>COURTESY FLUSH.
>
>
>OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER:
>
>This is a colleague who poops at work and is damn proud of it. You will
>often see an Out Of The Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a
>newspaper or magazine under his or her arm. Always look around the
>office for the Out Of The Closet Pooper before entering the bathroom.
>
>
>THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (P.F.N):
>
>A group of co-workers who band together to ensure emergency pooping
>goes off
>without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of Out
>Of The Closet Poopers, and identify SAFE HAVENS.
>
>
>SAFE HAVENS:
>
>A Safe Haven is a seldom-used bathroom somewhere in the building where
>you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the
>opposite
>sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the
>bathroom.
>
>
>TURD BURGLAR:
>
>This is someone who does not realize that you are in the stall and
>tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and
>vulnerable moments
>that can occur when taking a poop at work If this occurs, remain in the
>stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all
>uncomfortable eye contact.
>
>
>CAMO-COUGH:
>
>A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you
>are in
>a stall is called a Camo-Cough. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON,
>or to alert potential Turd Burglars. The Camo-Cough is very effective when
>used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.
>
>
>ASTAIRE:
>
>An Astaire is a subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Turd
>Burglars that you are occupying a stall. This will all doubt that the
>stall is occupied. If you hear an Astaire,leave the bathroom
>immediately so the pooper can poop in peace.
>
>
>WATERMELON:
>
>A watermelon is a big poop that creates a loud splash when hitting the
>toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a
>Watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.
>
>
>HAVANA OMELET:
>
>A case of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet
>water. Often acompanied by an Escapee. Try using a Camo-Cough with an
>Astaire.
>
>
>UNCLE TODD:
>
>An Uncle Todd is a bathroom user who seems to linger around forever.
>This person could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror
>or sitting on the pot. An Uncle Todd makes it difficult to relax while
>on the crapper, as you should always wait to poop when the bathroom is
>empty. This benefits you as well as other bathroom attendees.
>
>
>Hope the Survival Guide helps, as the WORKPOOP is an inevitable part of
>life. _________________

 

Haha I hate Turb Burglars lol

 

hahahahahaha

 

YOUR RIGHT that is funny

 

I bet Steve is an Uncle Todd.

 

no way man, i never stand around and never ever wash my hands....

 

ewwwwwwwww . I wash my hands just from being in a public bathroom. Let alone Wiping

 

pooooooooooooooooo

 

steve is the phantom ******* hahahahaha click the link

http://weird.steve.wasarrested.com/S-pa/philla%2E/ps

 

thats some funny **** man

 

thought you'd like that

 

nicks got one of these

 

wtf is it ?

 

something you put in your *** to make your **** come out in the shape of a star

 

funny how your so educated on **** art wtf lmao

 

steve wtf ? where do you find this fu(ked up **** at ?

 

the internets a beautiful thing man