BIKER
VS.
COMPUTER
WHAT WOULD BE DIFFERENT IF BILL GATES WERE A BIKER
( I FEEL A LOT OF THESE THINGS WOULD BE IMPROVEMENTS)


THEIR #1 PRODUCT WOULD BE MICROSOFT WINDERS
INSTEAD OF AN HOURGLASS ICON YOU WOULD GET A EMPTY BEER BOTTLE
OCCASIONALY YOU WOULD BRING UP A WINDOW COVERED WITH A TRASH BAG.
DIALOG BOXES WOULD GIVE YOU A CHOICE OF AHH-IGHT OR NAAA
INSTEAD OF TA-DA THE OPENING SOUND WOULD BE "ON THE ROAD AGAIN"
THE RECYCLE BIN IN WINDOWS WOULD BE AN OUTHOUSE
WHEN YOU PULLED UP THE SOUND PLAYER YOU WOULD HEAR A DRUNKEN REDNECK YELLING YEE-HAAA
THE WINDOWS THEAM SONG WOULD BE "BORN TO BE WILD"
THE WINDOWS LOGO WOULD INCORPORATE THE CONFEDERATE FLAG.
MICROSOFT WORD WOULD BE JUST THAT: ONE WORD.
NEW SHUTDOWN WAV: Y"ALL COME BACK NOW, YAH HEAR?
INSTEAD OF LATTE CARTS WE'D HAVE HOT DOG CARTS
MICROSOFT BIG SHOTS WOULD BE CALLED "CUZ" OR "BRO"
FOUR WORDS: OUTLAW BIKER SCREEN SAVER
MICROSOFT CEO: BUBBA GATES


YOU MIGHT BE HIGH TECH SCOOTER TRASH IF


YOUR E-MAIL ADDRESS ENDS IN "SCOOTER-TRASH.COM"
YOU CONNECT TO THE WEB USING A "DOWN HOME PAGE"
THE STICKER ON YOUR LAPTOP SAYS "PROTECTED BY SMITH AND WESSON"
YOUR TEE SHIRT READS "AOL SUCKS" INSTEAD OF "HELMENT LAWS SUCK"
YOUR COMPUTER IS WORTH MORE THAN YOUR BIKE IS.
YOUR WIFE SAYS "EITHER THE COUPUTER GOES OR SHE DOES",
AND YOU STILL DON'T MISS HER.
YOU HAVE EVER USED AN AOL CD-ROM AS A BEER COASTER
YOU REFER TO YOUR COMPUTER AS "LU LU", "****" OR "BITCH"
YOUR SCREEN SAVER IS A BIT MAP OF YOUR HARLEY
YOU START MOST OF YOUR E-MAILS WITH "HOWDY YA'LL" OR "HEY BUBBA"


SCOOTER TRASH GUIDE TO COMPUTER LINGO


"HARD DRIVE"
RIDING IN THE SNOW WITH BIG MAMA ON THE BACK
"KEYBOARD"
A PLACE TO HANG YOUR MOTORCYCLE KEYS
"WINDOW"
A PLACE TO TAPE A TRASH BAG
"FLOPPY"
WHEN YOU RUN OUT OF POLYGRIP
"MODEM"
HOW YOU GET RID OF DANDELIONS
"ROM"
DELICIOUS WHEN MIXED WITH COCA COLA
"BYTE"
FIRST WORD IN A KISS OFF PHRASE
"REBOOT"
WHAT YOU DO WHEN YOUR OLD ONES WEAR OUT
"NETWORK"
ACTIVITY TO GET BAIT FOR A TROUT LINE
"LAN"
TO BORROW AS IN, "HEY BUBBA LAN ME YOUR BIKE"
"BIT"
A WAGER AS IN "I BIT YOU CAN'T MAKE IT WITH THAT BLOND OVER THERE"
"PACKET"
WHAT YOU DO TO YOUR SADDLE BAG BEFORE A TRIP
"CURSOR"
WHEN YOUR LADY MAKES YOU MAD, WHAT YOU DO AS SOON AS SHE LEAVES THE ROOM.
"MOUSE"
FUZZY, SOFT THING YOU PUT IN YOUR BEER INORDER TO GET A FREE CASE

 

well i guess i am high tech scooter trash since i have a scooter trash screen name and e mail addy!! hell i should be getting paid....i am a walking advertisment!

 

nate i was just going to say that you are the high tech scooter trash. so tell everyone whats your somputers name? is it la la?

 

i like this one

YOU HAVE EVER USED AN AOL CD-ROM AS A BEER COASTER

considering i dont have a computer at home thats all they are good for in my house

 

how about nicks

 

thats all an aol cd should be used for.... a o hell

 

the computers name is nicks bitch

 

strange brew fo life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!