Keep a look out for these nasty things


The George Bush Virus - Causes your computer to
keep looking for viruses of mass destruction.

The Clinton Virus - Gives you a permanent Hard Drive
with NO memory.

The Al Gore Virus - Causes your computer to just keep
counting and re-counting.

The John Kerry virus - causes the floppy to flip flop on
it's stored memory.

The Bob Dole (aka Viagra) Virus - Makes a new hard
drive out of an old floppy.

The Lewinsky Virus - Sucks all the memory out of your
computer, then e-mails everyone about what it did.

The Arnold Schwarzeneger Virus - Terminates some
files, leaves, but will be back.

The Mike Tyson Virus - Quits after two bytes.

The Oprah Winfrey Virus - Your 200 GB hard drive
shrinks to 100 GB, then slowly expands to re-stabilize around 150 GB.

The Ellen Degeneres Virus - Disks can no longer be inserted.

The Prozac Virus - Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor
doesn't care.

The Joey Buttafuoco Virus - Only attacks minor files.

The Lorena Bobbitt Virus - Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch
floppy... then discards it through Windows.