Man Laws... Live by them.
06-01-2006, 01:49 PM
#1
I Enjoy Posting At StuntLife!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: flint
Age: 45
Posts: 3,244
Man Laws... Live by them.
Here are some Man Laws to live by.. I know a few of you are rule breakers so I thought I would post them up so you may conform to the said new rules from here on out.
No Man shall ever compliment another man on the softness of his hands.
You can take the last beer or the last wing but NOT both.
By no means shall another man refer to another mans clothing as an "outfit".
A man must tip a hot waitress or bartender MORE then a fast male waiter/bartender, no exceptions.
It is forbidden to have a pet named fluffy, snowball or mr wiskers.
Regardless of the name, a man is forbidden to see a manicurist.
Under no circumstances shall a man say "Let's take my scooter".
An arm rest belongs to the first arm to claim it.
Disccusions about sports uniforms shall never last more then 35 seconds, unless its to discuss the coolness of throwback uniforms.
Swim trunks shall not be shorter then 3" above the knee.
No matter how long the vacation your suitcase shall never exceed 1.8 cubic feet.
No matter how HOT, a man never alters his stride over hot sand.
Anything borrowed from another man shall be returned in good condition to the rightful owner. Unless that man has suffered serious injury, lost his senses or presumed dead.
A man may engage in gardening, but the said man shall MUST refer to it as farming.
A man is under NO obligation to notice or comment on another mans haircut.
Fireworks are ALWAYS in season.
The five second food rule always applies as long as you first blow the germs off before eating.
A man is allowed to own and operate a riding lawn mower as long as the yard to be mowed is atleast 1/2 of an acre.
It is ALWAYS acceptable for a man to cannonball into a pool. Any time, any circumstances. NO exceptions.
Men do NOT cheat at pool, darts or poker.
Under NO circumstances shall a man wear sunglasses indoors.
If a man has a car/bike that can lay rubber, he is obligated to do so from time to time.
At no time shall a man give another man his coat, if he says "He is chilly or cold" UNLESS he is on the verge of dying.
If you EVER compliment a guys "six pack" you had better be speaking of his choice in beverage.
Man to Man phone calls last no more then 5 minutes.
Salmon is a food, not a color.
All injures are treatable by "Walking it off" or "Rubbing some dirt on it"
Women who claims to love a sport, must be treated as spies until said knowledge of sport is proven.
Grilling regardless of the weather shall ALWAYS be the first choice of cooking.
No Man shall ever compliment another man on the softness of his hands.
You can take the last beer or the last wing but NOT both.
By no means shall another man refer to another mans clothing as an "outfit".
A man must tip a hot waitress or bartender MORE then a fast male waiter/bartender, no exceptions.
It is forbidden to have a pet named fluffy, snowball or mr wiskers.
Regardless of the name, a man is forbidden to see a manicurist.
Under no circumstances shall a man say "Let's take my scooter".
An arm rest belongs to the first arm to claim it.
Disccusions about sports uniforms shall never last more then 35 seconds, unless its to discuss the coolness of throwback uniforms.
Swim trunks shall not be shorter then 3" above the knee.
No matter how long the vacation your suitcase shall never exceed 1.8 cubic feet.
No matter how HOT, a man never alters his stride over hot sand.
Anything borrowed from another man shall be returned in good condition to the rightful owner. Unless that man has suffered serious injury, lost his senses or presumed dead.
A man may engage in gardening, but the said man shall MUST refer to it as farming.
A man is under NO obligation to notice or comment on another mans haircut.
Fireworks are ALWAYS in season.
The five second food rule always applies as long as you first blow the germs off before eating.
A man is allowed to own and operate a riding lawn mower as long as the yard to be mowed is atleast 1/2 of an acre.
It is ALWAYS acceptable for a man to cannonball into a pool. Any time, any circumstances. NO exceptions.
Men do NOT cheat at pool, darts or poker.
Under NO circumstances shall a man wear sunglasses indoors.
If a man has a car/bike that can lay rubber, he is obligated to do so from time to time.
At no time shall a man give another man his coat, if he says "He is chilly or cold" UNLESS he is on the verge of dying.
If you EVER compliment a guys "six pack" you had better be speaking of his choice in beverage.
Man to Man phone calls last no more then 5 minutes.
Salmon is a food, not a color.
All injures are treatable by "Walking it off" or "Rubbing some dirt on it"
Women who claims to love a sport, must be treated as spies until said knowledge of sport is proven.
Grilling regardless of the weather shall ALWAYS be the first choice of cooking.
Last edited by cbr9two9guy; 06-01-2006 at 02:11 PM.
06-01-2006, 04:59 PM
#4
Disturbed Riders
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Flint Town, MI
Posts: 3,781
Re: Man Laws... Live by them.
Originally Posted by cbr9two9guy
Here are some Man Laws to live by.. I know a few of you are rule breakers so I thought I would post them up so you may conform to the said new rules from here on out.
No Man shall ever compliment another man on the softness of his hands.
You can take the last beer or the last wing but NOT both.
By no means shall another man refer to another mans clothing as an "outfit".
A man must tip a hot waitress or bartender MORE then a fast male waiter/bartender, no exceptions.
It is forbidden to have a pet named fluffy, snowball or mr wiskers.
Regardless of the name, a man is forbidden to see a manicurist.
Under no circumstances shall a man say "Let's take my scooter".
An arm rest belongs to the first arm to claim it.
Disccusions about sports uniforms shall never last more then 35 seconds, unless its to discuss the coolness of throwback uniforms.
Swim trunks shall not be shorter then 3" above the knee.
No matter how long the vacation your suitcase shall never exceed 1.8 cubic feet.
No matter how HOT, a man never alters his stride over hot sand.
Anything borrowed from another man shall be returned in good condition to the rightful owner. Unless that man has suffered serious injury, lost his senses or presumed dead.
A man may engage in gardening, but the said man shall MUST refer to it as farming.
A man is under NO obligation to notice or comment on another mans haircut.
Fireworks are ALWAYS in season.
The five second food rule always applies as long as you first blow the germs off before eating.
A man is allowed to own and operate a riding lawn mower as long as the yard to be mowed is atleast 1/2 of an acre.
It is ALWAYS acceptable for a man to cannonball into a pool. Any time, any circumstances. NO exceptions.
Men do NOT cheat at pool, darts or poker.
Under NO circumstances shall a man wear sunglasses indoors.
If a man has a car/bike that can lay rubber, he is obligated to do so from time to time.
At no time shall a man give another man his coat, if he says "He is chilly or cold" UNLESS he is on the verge of dying.
If you EVER compliment a guys "six pack" you had better be speaking of his choice in beverage.
Man to Man phone calls last no more then 5 minutes.
Salmon is a food, not a color.
All injures are treatable by "Walking it off" or "Rubbing some dirt on it"
Women who claims to love a sport, must be treated as spies until said knowledge of sport is proven.
Grilling regardless of the weather shall ALWAYS be the first choice of cooking.
No Man shall ever compliment another man on the softness of his hands.
You can take the last beer or the last wing but NOT both.
By no means shall another man refer to another mans clothing as an "outfit".
A man must tip a hot waitress or bartender MORE then a fast male waiter/bartender, no exceptions.
It is forbidden to have a pet named fluffy, snowball or mr wiskers.
Regardless of the name, a man is forbidden to see a manicurist.
Under no circumstances shall a man say "Let's take my scooter".
An arm rest belongs to the first arm to claim it.
Disccusions about sports uniforms shall never last more then 35 seconds, unless its to discuss the coolness of throwback uniforms.
Swim trunks shall not be shorter then 3" above the knee.
No matter how long the vacation your suitcase shall never exceed 1.8 cubic feet.
No matter how HOT, a man never alters his stride over hot sand.
Anything borrowed from another man shall be returned in good condition to the rightful owner. Unless that man has suffered serious injury, lost his senses or presumed dead.
A man may engage in gardening, but the said man shall MUST refer to it as farming.
A man is under NO obligation to notice or comment on another mans haircut.
Fireworks are ALWAYS in season.
The five second food rule always applies as long as you first blow the germs off before eating.
A man is allowed to own and operate a riding lawn mower as long as the yard to be mowed is atleast 1/2 of an acre.
It is ALWAYS acceptable for a man to cannonball into a pool. Any time, any circumstances. NO exceptions.
Men do NOT cheat at pool, darts or poker.
Under NO circumstances shall a man wear sunglasses indoors.
If a man has a car/bike that can lay rubber, he is obligated to do so from time to time.
At no time shall a man give another man his coat, if he says "He is chilly or cold" UNLESS he is on the verge of dying.
If you EVER compliment a guys "six pack" you had better be speaking of his choice in beverage.
Man to Man phone calls last no more then 5 minutes.
Salmon is a food, not a color.
All injures are treatable by "Walking it off" or "Rubbing some dirt on it"
Women who claims to love a sport, must be treated as spies until said knowledge of sport is proven.
Grilling regardless of the weather shall ALWAYS be the first choice of cooking.
06-02-2006, 10:42 AM
#10
Lacks self-control
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Birch Run, MI
Age: 42
Posts: 7,588
Re: Man Laws... Live by them.
Originally Posted by BigJeff
Why work when you can sit home and make a living on posting on Stuntlife.com. What is it paying these days to try and become a post *****? LOL
Jeff
Jeff
06-03-2006, 05:07 AM
#15
Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Warshington
Age: 41
Posts: 574
Re: Man Laws... Live by them.
Originally Posted by cbr9two9guy
Women who claims to love a sport, must be treated as spies until said knowledge of sport is proven.
my girlfriend is better at basketball than me and knows more about most sports than me :-( but she likes wheelies.T
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