A kindergarten teacher one day is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word "definitely" to them. To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence. The first student raised his hand and said "The sky is definitely blue". The teacher said, "Well, that isn't entirely correct, because sometimes it's gray and cloudy".

Another student says, "Grass is definitely green." The teacher again replies "If grass doesn't get enough water it turns brown, so that isn't really correct either."

Another student raises his hand and asks the teacher "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher looked at him and said "No...But that isn't really a question you want to ask in class discussion." So the student replies, "Then I definitely **** my pants."


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A depressed young woman was so desperate that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. When she went down to the docks, a handsome young sailor noticed her tears, took pity on her, and said, "Look, you've got a lot to live for. I'm off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take good care of you and bring you food every day." Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added, "I'll keep you happy, and you'll keep me happy."

The girl nodded yes, after all, what did she have to lose? That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn.

Three weeks later, during a routine search, she was discovered by the captain. 'What are you doing here?' the captain asked. She got up off the ground and explained, "I have an arrangement with one of the sailors. He's taking me to Europe, and he's screwing me."

The captain looked at her, "He sure is lady, this is the Staten Island Ferry.'


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those are both fan-fu(king-tastic

 

LOL

 

That first one made me laugh outloud

 

Hey Carla post a full size pic of your avatar, I want to see that

 

I don't know how to do that...can u help?
<-----------------this one?

 

Yeah, that one. I just want to see what its a pic of, it looks kinda hot.

 

I got it avatar size, i can post it up if you can resize it....It's GOGO from Kill Bill 1...

 

Do you have the whole picture, or just the leg and ball?

 

Just the leg and ball...

 

I just found this pix (google is great)

 

Here is a few more of her....

 

Couple more...ok i am done now!!

 

Those were hilarious!

 

Very nice Looks like I need to change professions