the parrott
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From: Would you be shocked if I said Chicago?
the parrott
Guy is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch. It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, "Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot?"
?
The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot."
?
"Holy crap," the guy replies. "You actually understood and answered me!"
?
"I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a highly intelligent thoroughly educated bird."
?
"Oh yeah?" the guy asks, "Then answer this -- how do you hang onto your perch without any feet?"
?
"Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing but since you asked, I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see it because of my feathers."
?
"Wow," says the guy. "You really can understand and speak English can't you?"
?
"Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics, religion, sports, physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You really ought to buy me. I'd be a great companion."
?
The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag. "Sorry, but I just can't afford that."
?
"Pssssssst," says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody wants me cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for $20; just make the guy an offer!"
?
The guy offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.
?
Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful. The guy is delighted.
?
One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot goes, "Psssssssssssst," and motions him over with one wing.? "I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife and the postman."
?
"What are you talking about?" asks the guy.
?
"When the postman delivered the mail today, your wife greeted him at the door in a sheer black nightie."
?
"WHAT???" the guy asks incredulously. "THEN what happened?"
?
"Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie and began petting her all over," reported the parrot.
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"NO!" he exclaims. "And she let him?"
?
"Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie,got down on his knees and began to kiss her all over...."
?
Then the frantic guy demands, "THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"
?
"Damned if I know. I got a hard-on and fell off my perch!"
?
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
If this doesn't make you laugh, you're having a bad day! ?
?
The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot."
?
"Holy crap," the guy replies. "You actually understood and answered me!"
?
"I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a highly intelligent thoroughly educated bird."
?
"Oh yeah?" the guy asks, "Then answer this -- how do you hang onto your perch without any feet?"
?
"Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing but since you asked, I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see it because of my feathers."
?
"Wow," says the guy. "You really can understand and speak English can't you?"
?
"Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics, religion, sports, physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You really ought to buy me. I'd be a great companion."
?
The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag. "Sorry, but I just can't afford that."
?
"Pssssssst," says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody wants me cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for $20; just make the guy an offer!"
?
The guy offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.
?
Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful. The guy is delighted.
?
One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot goes, "Psssssssssssst," and motions him over with one wing.? "I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife and the postman."
?
"What are you talking about?" asks the guy.
?
"When the postman delivered the mail today, your wife greeted him at the door in a sheer black nightie."
?
"WHAT???" the guy asks incredulously. "THEN what happened?"
?
"Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie and began petting her all over," reported the parrot.
?
"NO!" he exclaims. "And she let him?"
?
"Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie,got down on his knees and began to kiss her all over...."
?
Then the frantic guy demands, "THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"
?
"Damned if I know. I got a hard-on and fell off my perch!"
?
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
If this doesn't make you laugh, you're having a bad day! ?
Thread Starter
I Love To Post!
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 5,042
From: Would you be shocked if I said Chicago?
Re: the parrott
Originally Posted by JD
that is funny....*ahem* more *ahem*
