Jeff Foxworthy on New Hampshire
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 1,778
From: Nash-Lantic City, NH
Jeff Foxworthy on New Hampshire
Jeff Foxworthy on NH residents:
1 - If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling
through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping
that the food will swim by, you might live in NH.
2 - If you're proud that your region makes the national news
96 nights each year because Concord is the coldest spot
in the nation, you might live in NH.
3 - If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through
April, you might live in NH.
4 - If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months
out of the year, you might live in NH.
5 - If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they
don't work there, you might live in NH.
6 - If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the
middle of his forehead, you might live in NH.
7 - If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you
might live in NH.
8 - If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you
might live in NH.
9 - If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with
someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in NH.
YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE New Hampshireite WHEN:
1. "Vacation" means going up north past I-95 for the weekend.
2. You measure distance in hours.
3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and
back again.
5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging
blizzard, without flinching.
6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events
(including weddings).
7. You install security lights on your house and garage and
leave both unlocked.
8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend
knows how to use them.
9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a
snowsuit.
10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are
filled with snow.
11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still
winter and road construction.
12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer
next to your blue spruce.
14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.
15. Down South to you means Massachusetts.
16. A brat is something you eat.
17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole
shed.
18. You go out to a fish fry every Friday.
19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."
1 - If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling
through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping
that the food will swim by, you might live in NH.
2 - If you're proud that your region makes the national news
96 nights each year because Concord is the coldest spot
in the nation, you might live in NH.
3 - If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through
April, you might live in NH.
4 - If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months
out of the year, you might live in NH.
5 - If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they
don't work there, you might live in NH.
6 - If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the
middle of his forehead, you might live in NH.
7 - If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you
might live in NH.
8 - If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you
might live in NH.
9 - If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with
someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in NH.
YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE New Hampshireite WHEN:
1. "Vacation" means going up north past I-95 for the weekend.
2. You measure distance in hours.
3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and
back again.
5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging
blizzard, without flinching.
6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events
(including weddings).
7. You install security lights on your house and garage and
leave both unlocked.
8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend
knows how to use them.
9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a
snowsuit.
10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are
filled with snow.
11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still
winter and road construction.
12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer
next to your blue spruce.
14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.
15. Down South to you means Massachusetts.
16. A brat is something you eat.
17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole
shed.
18. You go out to a fish fry every Friday.
19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."
Registered User
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 373
From: drama vegas, n'ampsher
Re: Jeff Foxworthy on New Hampshire
stright chill chilln here man, workin workin workin, ya know how it is, if aryana start takin a bottle this week i am goin to stop by fri with her to see ya or i'll bring her to the shop this weekend. we are just so damn crammed with **** to do all the time that i havent had the chance to stop by and see how my boys are doin 
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