Some jokes for ya all
03-17-2003, 08:33 PM
#1
Moderater Wannabe
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Sandown,NH
Age: 46
Posts: 1,756
Some jokes for ya all
A Hole in the Head
Why does a man's ***** have a hole in it?
So he can get oxygen to his brain.
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An Ugly Position
What's the position to make ugly babies?
Ask your parents.
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Baaaaad Breath
Yo' breath so stank, it's like your tongue farted!
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You're So Stupid... Color TV
You're so stupid, your mother told you to go buy a color television and you asked, What color?
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Osama = Crabs?
What do Osama bin Laden and crabs have in common?
They both irritate Bush.
Why does a man's ***** have a hole in it?
So he can get oxygen to his brain.
__________________________________________________ __
An Ugly Position
What's the position to make ugly babies?
Ask your parents.
__________________________________________________ __
Baaaaad Breath
Yo' breath so stank, it's like your tongue farted!
__________________________________________________ __
You're So Stupid... Color TV
You're so stupid, your mother told you to go buy a color television and you asked, What color?
__________________________________________________ __
Osama = Crabs?
What do Osama bin Laden and crabs have in common?
They both irritate Bush.
03-17-2003, 09:28 PM
#2
Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Fremont,NH
Age: 48
Posts: 871
One day a teacher went into her class room and saw the word, ***** written in small letters on the chalkboard. She erased it and went on with the day's lesson. The next day, she came in and saw the same word on the chalkbaord, but a little bit bigger. She erased it and went on with her lesson.
Each of the next several days, the teacher would come in to find ***** on the board, a little larger each time. She went in one morning, expecting to find it again, but instead the chalkboard read: The more you rub it, the bigger it gets.
Each of the next several days, the teacher would come in to find ***** on the board, a little larger each time. She went in one morning, expecting to find it again, but instead the chalkboard read: The more you rub it, the bigger it gets.
Last edited by bass909; 03-17-2003 at 09:31 PM.
03-20-2003, 08:32 AM
#11
Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Kingston, NH
Age: 45
Posts: 138
I got a quick one for ya...
A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I cant stop passing gas. Luckily, my farts dont smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, Ive farted twice since Ive been here in your office, but you didnt even notice."
"I can help you," says the doc. "Take these pills and come back next week."
The next week, the lady returns. "Doctor," she says, "I dont know what you gave me, but now my farts reek."
The doctor says, "Good, we fixed your sinuses! Now lets work on your hearing."
"I can help you," says the doc. "Take these pills and come back next week."
The next week, the lady returns. "Doctor," she says, "I dont know what you gave me, but now my farts reek."
The doctor says, "Good, we fixed your sinuses! Now lets work on your hearing."
03-20-2003, 06:04 PM
#17
Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Fremont,NH
Age: 48
Posts: 871
There was this french guy and a black guy
they did not know each other but they road on the same bus to gether every day
now the french guy sits down on the in the bus and smells his fingers and says oh fefe oh fefe
the black guy saw what he was doing but ignored it
the next day the french guy gets on the bus again and does the same thing oh fefe oh fefe
so the black guy ask "what r u doing" french guy says "i finger my wife everyday so that i can smell her all day"
so the next day the black guy gets on the bus and sits down and smells is whole arm and says oh shaniqua oh shaniqua
they did not know each other but they road on the same bus to gether every day
now the french guy sits down on the in the bus and smells his fingers and says oh fefe oh fefe
the black guy saw what he was doing but ignored it
the next day the french guy gets on the bus again and does the same thing oh fefe oh fefe
so the black guy ask "what r u doing" french guy says "i finger my wife everyday so that i can smell her all day"
so the next day the black guy gets on the bus and sits down and smells is whole arm and says oh shaniqua oh shaniqua
Last edited by armani1515; 03-20-2003 at 06:15 PM.
03-21-2003, 08:36 PM
#18
Been here a LONG time
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Kingston, NH
Age: 42
Posts: 7,373
Budweiser Bubba, a man from down south, calls up his laywer to ask him a few questions ...
"Is it true," Bubba asks, "that people are sueing the tobacco companies because cigarettes cause cancer?"
"Yes," the laywer replies.
"And, is it true that people are sueing fast food companies for causing them to get fat and clogging their arteries by selling all those burgers and french fries?"
"Yes, Bubba, but why?" the laywer questions.
"Well, I was thinking of sueing Budweiser for all of these ulgy women that I have been waking up with lately..."
"Is it true," Bubba asks, "that people are sueing the tobacco companies because cigarettes cause cancer?"
"Yes," the laywer replies.
"And, is it true that people are sueing fast food companies for causing them to get fat and clogging their arteries by selling all those burgers and french fries?"
"Yes, Bubba, but why?" the laywer questions.
"Well, I was thinking of sueing Budweiser for all of these ulgy women that I have been waking up with lately..."
03-21-2003, 09:23 PM
#19
Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: manchvegas
Age: 44
Posts: 448
Two guys get busted for smoking dope, so they have to go into court on a Friday. They go to court and the judge says, "If you can convince more than 5 people to stop doing drugs for the rest of their lives, you won't be sent to jail."
So the two men agree and the judge tells them to come back on Monday.
So the two guys come back on Monday and the judge asks how they did.
''I got 17 people to get off drugs,'' says the first guy.
''Wow, how'd you do that?'' asks the judge.
''I used circles. I told them that this large circle is your brain before drugs and this small circle is your brain after drugs.''
''Oh, that's nothing!" said the second guy. "I convinced 156 people to get off drugs.''
''Wow. How'd you do that?'' asked the judge.
''Well, I used circles too. I told them this small circle is your butthole before prison...''
So the two men agree and the judge tells them to come back on Monday.
So the two guys come back on Monday and the judge asks how they did.
''I got 17 people to get off drugs,'' says the first guy.
''Wow, how'd you do that?'' asks the judge.
''I used circles. I told them that this large circle is your brain before drugs and this small circle is your brain after drugs.''
''Oh, that's nothing!" said the second guy. "I convinced 156 people to get off drugs.''
''Wow. How'd you do that?'' asked the judge.
''Well, I used circles too. I told them this small circle is your butthole before prison...''
