A very ugly man walks into the bar with a big grin on his face and orders a draft beer.

"Whatare you so happy about?" asks the barman.

"Well,I'll tell you," replies the ugly man. "You know, I live by therailroad tracks. Well, on my way home last night, I noticed a young woman tied to the tracks, like in the films. I, of course, went and cut her free andtook her back to my place. Anyway, to make a long story short, I scored big time! We made love all night, all over the house. We did everything,me on top, sometimes her on top, every position imaginable!"

"Fantastic!"exclaimed the barman. "You lucky bastard, was she pretty?

"Dunno...Neverfound the head!"

 

ahhh fumble, lol

 

Courtesy of a canadian. Aka durty.

Why don't black parents let their little black babies in the sandbox?

Cuz cats keep trying to bury them


What starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person,

NeighboR

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew?

Pizza's don't scream when you put them in the oven.

 

I heard this one today .

What do you call a mexican girl with no legs ?

*****-way-low

 

What do you call four Mexicans in quicksand?

~ Quatro Cinco

Did you hear about the winner of the Mexican Beauty Contest?

~ Me Neither.

What do you call a Mexican without a lawn mower?

~ Unemployed.

 

A young girl asks her mom,"Mom, where do babies come from?" Mother answers,"Well, mothers and fathers like your dad and I make love.....and your father puts his ***** in my vagina, and that's how you get a baby." Girl says, "OK, well last night I saw that daddy had his ***** in your mouth.....What do you get from that?" Mother answers, "Jewelery."

 

Why does the easter bunny hide easter eggs ?

Because he doesn't want anyone to know he's having sex with a chicken .

 

what to name a retarded asian child?? som-ting-wong!!!