Girls always blaming the guy when they get knocked up

[DLISH]

"it takes two to tango"-d

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[covertwar]

Originally Posted by ROCK~N~929

This topic will always be there.

You are right about that man.

Maybe it needs to be talked about,but not like this or laid out on a motorcycle form.

I am an active member of maybe 8 or 9 message boards and this is the 4th time I have witnessed this "touchy" topic unfurl, and none of those boards are parenting or pregnancy forums either, and obviously I have a lot to say about it, maybe it's from arguing my point so much, or maybe I am bitter from my own experience, like Shaggy, but you can't run away from problems by not discussing them. It has been laid on the table, people have spoken, and that is that. If you people believe you are right, well, that is your right. If you don't want to talk about in Open Discussion, what if it happens to you someday? Will you decide to talk about it then? These are the questions you must ask.

If this thread should not be here it will be removed accordingly.

[Brian~11]

People need council....A stunt board IMO is not actually help. Ya know
You got people giving bad advice and not understanding both sides.

Really thats all I'm thinking...is that certain people w/ these problems need to seek Professional help and guidance. Not get info on the stunt board.
Most of the peeps on here haven't really experienced life as you or myself for that matter.

I have witnessed this several times and helped people through it.

I'm finished ....It's not gonna make a diff.

Good luck w/ the discussion

[covertwar]

I agree with you about the help part, like somebody told me tonight, a bunch of two year olds will reply to your thread talkign crap if you need help.

[R6Rider4Life]

OK, so I'm gonna chime in here and yes it's a RANT because right now I've got baby mama drama. I know what it's like to fu(k a whore... not just a woman that has lots of sex (because it's equally ok for a woman to have just as much as a man)... but a bonafide whore. 6 kids by 4 different guys, using yours and my tax dollars paying for her and her other kids... here's the catch... I PAY CHILD SUPPORT AND HAVE FROM DAY 1. My son is #3 in line for those who just assumed that I was last at bat. Well I found out that when we were dating that she was also putting out to 5 other guys and 1 woman. For those of you who think it's cool to have your chick messing with another chick.... wait until you come home and find that sh*t. Most of you think you'd be right there with the invitation to play and make your fantasy come true... unlikely though. With my job there was alot of time for her to get "lonely" I guess. The worst thing is that even though, as soon as my son was born, I set into motion all the correct steps to establish paternity and child support/visitation, some other motherphucker signed the birth certificate... and after years of lawyers bills and court dates this is still the case... and I couldn't get his last name changed to mine. THAT'S COMPLETELY SH*TTY. There's no way to trace her heritage lines... she's from an adopted family with absolutely no background information on her parents. So my son is being denied the ability to continue my blood line. Here's where the drama that has me stressing out today... she informed me that she's now decided to move out of state to get away from her husband, who's in prison currently but will no doubt be released soon. She's not taking 3 of her kids, #'s 1 & 2 live with their father... #4 she doesn't want to take with her. She wants to take #3 (my son) and #'s 5 & 6, the newborn twins. She's taking my son out of school before the end of the school year and moving him to a location many states away. So perhaps it's bad to ask for someone else's perspective on my situation but that's what I'm asking for. What would you do? Adult responses only.

[ryanaka99cents]

Originally Posted by R6Rider4Life

OK, so I'm gonna chime in here and yes it's a RANT because right now I've got baby mama drama. I know what it's like to fu(k a whore... not just a woman that has lots of sex (because it's equally ok for a woman to have just as much as a man)... but a bonafide whore. 6 kids by 4 different guys, using yours and my tax dollars paying for her and her other kids... here's the catch... I PAY CHILD SUPPORT AND HAVE FROM DAY 1. My son is #3 in line for those who just assumed that I was last at bat. Well I found out that when we were dating that she was also putting out to 5 other guys and 1 woman. For those of you who think it's cool to have your chick messing with another chick.... wait until you come home and find that sh*t. Most of you think you'd be right there with the invitation to play and make your fantasy come true... unlikely though. With my job there was alot of time for her to get "lonely" I guess. The worst thing is that even though, as soon as my son was born, I set into motion all the correct steps to establish paternity and child support/visitation, some other motherphucker signed the birth certificate... and after years of lawyers bills and court dates this is still the case... and I couldn't get his last name changed to mine. THAT'S COMPLETELY SH*TTY. There's no way to trace her heritage lines... she's from an adopted family with absolutely no background information on her parents. So my son is being denied the ability to continue my blood line. Here's where the drama that has me stressing out today... she informed me that she's now decided to move out of state to get away from her husband, who's in prison currently but will no doubt be released soon. She's not taking 3 of her kids, #'s 1 & 2 live with their father... #4 she doesn't want to take with her. She wants to take #3 (my son) and #'s 5 & 6, the newborn twins. She's taking my son out of school before the end of the school year and moving him to a location many states away. So perhaps it's bad to ask for someone else's perspective on my situation but that's what I'm asking for. What would you do? Adult responses only.

Need to know if you have joint custody??? If you don't your F-U-C-K-E-D. If you do she can't leave the state w/o your permission. Final thought, it would be worth the time and effort to take her to court and get custody of the child and prove the point that she is a whore and not able to take correct care of your child. If you have visitation rights you have "ownership" of the child therfore you have say on whether or not she can leave the state with your child. anymore questions ask away

[R6Rider4Life]

Thanks Ryan.. no I don't have joint custody but I DO have visitation and I'm the one who is allowed by law to claim him on my taxes.

[ryanaka99cents]

Originally Posted by R6Rider4Life

Thanks Ryan.. no I don't have joint custody but I DO have visitation and I'm the one who is allowed by law to claim him on my taxes.

TAKE HER TO COURT AND GET CUSTODY, from what I can see you have a steady job and well balanced life, she just handed off her first 2 kids the the father, but is taking yours and the twins who's father is apparently in prison. I CAN NOT see and Judge in there right mind not granting you full custody and giving her visitation rights. Guarantee she'd move away and never come visit your child again. First things first though, you need to PROVE you visited that child and a regular basis and provided for him. Second thing you need to prove is that you are an upstanding citizen in the community and your jobs should reflect that. Third you need to show that you don't have several other children with other women, from what you've already stated it doesn't sound as such, (this will include unwanted pregnancies and abortions/adoptions). Fourth you need to prove the exsistance of all FOUR "fathers" and ages of all the children and how long your relationship with her was. You were the third "father" from what I can see and (why the hell did you.........forget it) need to prove her an unfit parent. Fifth no women with 6 children and 4 fathers who's current husband who is in prison can leave the state with your child. Good Luck Bro

[aNskY]

im w/ tenny covert and shaggy....

no one's being sexist or anything, were just saying the two parties need to SHARE the blame, instead of today's society/system placing it all on the male.

[cal]

most people suck at giving advice, while their intentions are good they might not be spot on with what theyre tellin you.

[ON1WHEEL]

Originally Posted by Shaggy

They tell me to "BE A MAN AND STEP UP AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR WHAT I DID TO THEIR PRECIOUS LITTLE ANGEL OF A DAUGHTER" who took it in the azz BTW and guzzled c*m like a champ.

Holy shit that was funny to me for some reason.

[Dyno]

Originally Posted by ROCK~N~929

Both are responsible. The guy is also responsible if he didn't wear protection.
If she chooses not to have a abortion thats her decision. And she won't have to get you to man up. The Courts will!

well if she chooses not to get an abortion, and the guy wants one. then she should be stuck with the baby, if she wants to keep it and the guy doesnt then she should take care of it all byherself.

[Cdawg02]

SHAGGY: damn good point man! and everyone should just step up and take responsibility (in my case im talkin about women)

I was raised by my dad so i know there are guys out there who fully deserves credit in this area...my mother purposely got pregnant, dad proposed, she left and moved to denver! its dumb b*tchez like my mother who should quit bein trifflin hoez and not just dump the responsibility on someone else either by sayin here its ur kid too and givin them to their dad or givin them up for adoption---if u dont want a kid take some damn precautions!!!

[binder929rr]

Originally Posted by covertwar

You beautiful ladies are entirely correct, but this man was emphasising the fact that many <b>girls</b> tend to squarely put blame on a man for impregnating her, even though they had consensual intercourse.

Yes, he made it very clear that both parties are responsible, I do not see why his post is irrelevent or unintelligent, it may be slighty distorted or hostile due to rage, but it still does place the burden of child-bearing on both parties.

Sincerely,

exactly what covert said. people aren't reading this right. he didn't call anyone a whore or say it was all the females fault. but yes, i hear this all the time too, the girl immediately blames the guy for the problem. if it was an accident, then it was BOTH of their accidents. but if she lets him bang her without a condom, tha'ts a concious choice on her part and she is just as mcuh to blame as the guy.
and about the respectable girls, how could you even think this is refering to them? obviously if she's doing the guy the first time they met then that has something to say about the people....guy or girl.

people need to grow thicker skin, if this post hurts someone's feelings, you won't make it in reality.

[VMCgirl]

Here's what I don't get

1) Why should this thread be deleted? This is an open forum for all who are registered. If you don't like the topic, don't read it and don't reply.

2) Why shouldn't people be able to express their opinions? That's what they are, OPINIONS. Each is entitled to his own... that's part of what we just fought a damn war for.

3) People giving advice - If you are looking for advice on SL, there is pleny of it. But that's what it is, advice. At the end of each day, the decisions that we make are our own and we are responsible for their consequences, regardless of what other people suggest we do.

My 2 cents on the topic -

TO BOTH SEXES: Take responsibility for your own actions. Protect yourself the best you can, and, if it doesn't work like it's supposed to, be prepared to accept the consequences. If you're not prepared to accept the possible outcomes, don't sleep together.

[Jeskimo]

Originally Posted by Dyno

well if she chooses not to get an abortion, and the guy wants one. then she should be stuck with the baby, if she wants to keep it and the guy doesnt then she should take care of it all byherself.

Yeah but try being the girl whose pregnant and THEN make the decision to have an abortion....

[StangGoddess]

I can not stress this enough people. BIRTH CONTROL AND CONDOM'S!!!!! HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[Jope]

FUK, READING SOME OF THE POSTS MADE BY FEMALES MAKES ME FUKING ANGRY!!!!!!!! HERE'S THE EASIEST SOLUTION TO THIS ISSUE, IF YOU DON'T WANT TO GET PREGNANT OR GET SOME GIRL PREGNANT THEN DON'T FUK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! remember the fact that there's no such thing as a 100% effective birth control method, so every single time you have sex there's still a risk of getting pregnant and if you know you're not ready to be, then don't have sex at all, STOP BLAMING US GUYS FOR IT, PART OF IT IS OUR FAULT BUT WE DO NOT PUT A GUN TO YOUR HEAD AND TELL YOU TO SPREAD THEM Kenny is 100% right, why should we be ones to be blamed all the fuking time??? why do you ask us to step up and be a man and why can't you step up and be a woman as well, and remember that this is coming from a FATHER OF TWO BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN which my oldest was made by mistake, BUT BOTH MY WIFE AND I WERE AWARE OF THE RISK OF HER GETTING PREGNANT and we decided to get married and become a family.

[RRQT]

Originally Posted by Jeskimo

Yeah but try being the girl whose pregnant and THEN make the decision to have an abortion....

Exactly ... it is easy to tell someone to have an abortion ... But the male isn't the one that is going to have to go through with the surgery and all the other pain that comes with the abortion ... ... There is a lot of pain, both physically and emotionally.

My take on the whole thing is that if you are not able to raise a child and take the consequences that might come of sex then do not have sex ... A child could always be the consequence ... If you can play then you should be able to pay ...

[covertwar]

Originally Posted by Jope-K

Kenny

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